Today, I'm thankful...thankful for awareness of past pains that have resurfaced; thankful because thru the gift of awareness and expression of past pains and griefs, I am healing emotionally. Thankful that I no longer have to hide from pain...that I and loved and protected and nurtured by the Presence of a Loving Parent God; that I have a circle of trusted friends who are there in support of me...and I of them; that we can be real with each other...expressing true feelings and true thoughts...without condemnation...with love and acceptance of our humanness.
No longer do I feel the need to stay trapped in the self imposed prison of self abandonment...ignoring, discounting what I feel; what I need; what I want...I have the right to be exactly who I am in any given moment; and to ask for what I want or need; trusting God with provision...I feel free today and oh so thankful.
Once upon a time, I weighed well over 100 pounds more than I do today. By the Grace of God, awareness, and help from others who overcame this health challenge, I have been a healthy body size for over 3 1/2 years...a true gift. An obese body was a sign of my level of self abandonment. I ignored myself...my feelings; perceptions...I did not value myself and all the wonderful gifts I have to offer; and consequently, I accepted the same treatment from others....I was attracted, drawn to others who ignored me as well...but, as I have healed and acknowledged my pains; shed tears, shared words and prayed for and received God's healing and strengthening, I am different and I choose differently. I have grown immensely in self-love and appreciation; and my circle of trusted friends love and appreciate me as well...I am healing and healthier emotionally and am drawn to those who are healing and healthier emotionally. A part of God's healing and strengthening process for me included (s)counseling, support group participation and mentorship as well as gradual change from the unhealthy to the healthy expression of emotion/grief; migration from the unhealthy ways of doing to the healthy ways of doing.
So, today, I honor God, I acknowledge God who has rescued me from path of self destruction and set my feet on his path of healing and health as I am lovingly guided to higher and higher levels of awarness and healing through faith action....
May you embrace God's abundance and healing this day in every way...you're worth it :)
No comments:
Post a Comment